Do you ride the MBTA in Boston? From spontaneous fires to poor maintenance, the T has become a poster child of government inefficiency. As such, here’s our doting description of each of the transit lines.
Green Line
The only line that a quadriplegic can outrun. If you’re on this line, you’re most likely a freshman on your way to an illegal house party.
Orange Line
The orange line is home to our beloved neighborhood super hero, Spiderman! It’s also the preferred train for our homeless population when the weather gets a little nippy… you know that Noreaster we get around here.
Red Line
Ah… The Red Line – the line that spontaneously catches on fire or derails for no reason. If you’re on this line, you’re either the CEO of Moderna or a parole officer on your way home from Murderpan Mattapan.
Silver Line
And then we have the Silver Line! Which is really a bus pretending to be a train. If you’re on this line, you’re either too cheap to get an Uber or you don’t have friends who care enough to give you a ride to the airport.
Blue Line
Last but not least, we have the Blue Line. The line that’s named after the harbor and goes under water…. much like everything in Revere and East Boston.
